Romans 8:28
And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to [his] purpose.
I am a Christian who believes that I have surrendered to God’s perfect will for my life. That perfect will included discussing my life in an open book to the world. In spite of my faith and the fact that I surrendered to God’s will, I am having a difficult time today. I feel like a victim. I am anxious, fearful, impatient, and sad.
I believe with my whole heart that I am living a life of purpose. I know in my spirit that I must wait on God and that he will be glorified after my divine purpose is fully accomplished. Although I am living a purpose driven life my flesh and mind are wrestling with my needs and desires.
In this blog entry I am going to share some of my past emotions and thoughts that I experienced as I pursued my divine purpose.
I am a black female and I experienced discrimination while employed by New York State Department of Corrections. From 1993 to 1996 I was the victim of a continued hostile work environment, discrimination, and retaliation at Albion Correctional Facility.
Shortly after I filed my Title VII case without an attorney in 1997, God told me “You will be victorious in this matter.” I believed God because with God nothing is impossible. It was with this firm belief and trust in God’s promise that I was able to exhaust all avenues for judicial redress.
May 24, 2001
Judge Elfvin issued a twenty-four-page court order that dismissed my Title VII case. The court order did not even mention the fact that seven of the declarations filed by The New York State Attorney General’s Office contained perjured statements.
Although my case was dismissed by the United States District Court for the Western District of New York I held on to God’s promise. After I got over the initial disappointment I started working on my appeal to the Second Circuit Court of Appeals.
January 25, 2002
I felt disappointed as I read the Appeal Court’s decision. The United States Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit issued its order upholding the decision of United States District Court for the Western District of New York. The Appeal Court agreed with Judge Elfvin's order that dismissed my case.
http://vlex.com/vid/18529506
January 25, 2002
I felt disappointed as I read the Appeal Court’s decision. The United States Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit issued its order upholding the decision of United States District Court for the Western District of New York. The Appeal Court agreed with Judge Elfvin's order that dismissed my case.
http://vlex.com/vid/18529506
I didn’t understand the fact that neither court order addressed my argument that the New York State Attorney General’s Office had presented perjured non-retaliatory explanations in their sworn declarations filed in the district court.
My faith was tested by the Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit’s ruling. I still believed God’s promise that I would be victorious in this matter. I also believed that God would be honored even more after I successful argued and won my case before The United States Supreme Court.
June 24, 2002
The nine Supreme Court Justices have wide discretion in deciding what cases to review. The Supreme Court Justices and law clerks of the Court review nearly 9,000 appeals that are filed each year and pick about 80 to decide.
I filed a Writ of Certiorari and nine Appendix (exhibits) with the United States Supreme Court. I was aware of the almost impossibility that my case would be reviewed but I worked countless hours preparing my Writ of Certiorari. As I typed the 40-paged Writ, I held on to God’s promise that I would be victorious in this matter.
November 4, 2002
Today The Supreme Court of the United States of America issued an order that upheld the Second Circuit Court of Appeals' decision not to reverse the district court's summary judgment order. I understood the reality that The Supreme Court of the United States of America reviews less than 100 of the approximately 9,000 cases filed with the Court each year. I didn’t understand the fact that my case wasn’t selected as one of the cases for review.
After I read the Supreme Court's “decision” I burst out in loud cries of anguish and disbelief. I cried out to God in pain and utter disappointment. How would I live when the very foundation of my faith received a near fatal blow? I lapsed into something deeper than depression. How could I go on with my life after experiencing such an unjust decision? How could I function in a world were lies prevail over the truth? I didn’t know what to think or what to do. I no longer had a job or the hope of being victorious in my lawsuit. I felt like a complete failure.
Fall 2004
I read the “Purpose Driven Life” and received teaching on purpose at two different churches. After I read Rick Warren’s divinely inspired book it changed my life. I realized that I was victorious in my case because God’s purpose for my life was revealed to me.
My divine purpose is to shed light on employment discrimination in America. I believe that this light will reveal that Congress needs to investigate, address and/or amend the Civil Rights Act of 1964. Amending the Act again would prevent one judge from having the absolute power to grant summary judgment motions that dismiss discrimination and retaliation cases.
My faith was tested by the Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit’s ruling. I still believed God’s promise that I would be victorious in this matter. I also believed that God would be honored even more after I successful argued and won my case before The United States Supreme Court.
June 24, 2002
The nine Supreme Court Justices have wide discretion in deciding what cases to review. The Supreme Court Justices and law clerks of the Court review nearly 9,000 appeals that are filed each year and pick about 80 to decide.
I filed a Writ of Certiorari and nine Appendix (exhibits) with the United States Supreme Court. I was aware of the almost impossibility that my case would be reviewed but I worked countless hours preparing my Writ of Certiorari. As I typed the 40-paged Writ, I held on to God’s promise that I would be victorious in this matter.
November 4, 2002
Today The Supreme Court of the United States of America issued an order that upheld the Second Circuit Court of Appeals' decision not to reverse the district court's summary judgment order. I understood the reality that The Supreme Court of the United States of America reviews less than 100 of the approximately 9,000 cases filed with the Court each year. I didn’t understand the fact that my case wasn’t selected as one of the cases for review.
After I read the Supreme Court's “decision” I burst out in loud cries of anguish and disbelief. I cried out to God in pain and utter disappointment. How would I live when the very foundation of my faith received a near fatal blow? I lapsed into something deeper than depression. How could I go on with my life after experiencing such an unjust decision? How could I function in a world were lies prevail over the truth? I didn’t know what to think or what to do. I no longer had a job or the hope of being victorious in my lawsuit. I felt like a complete failure.
Fall 2004
I read the “Purpose Driven Life” and received teaching on purpose at two different churches. After I read Rick Warren’s divinely inspired book it changed my life. I realized that I was victorious in my case because God’s purpose for my life was revealed to me.
My divine purpose is to shed light on employment discrimination in America. I believe that this light will reveal that Congress needs to investigate, address and/or amend the Civil Rights Act of 1964. Amending the Act again would prevent one judge from having the absolute power to grant summary judgment motions that dismiss discrimination and retaliation cases.
February 18, 2006
I was born 52 years ago today. I have chosen this day to begin my journey fulfilling the divine purpose of my birth. I know that I was born black and poor on February 18, 1954, to write “A Case of Racial Discrimination and Retaliation Real or Imagined.”
November 12, 2006
Today I am currently writing on the retaliation I experienced at Albion. I am overwhelmed with anxiety as I continue to view extensive evidence of discrimination and failure of anyone to help me. I am in tears as I type this.
This is the day that Dr. Martin Luther King’s Memorial was dedicated. Oprah gave a moving speech in honor of Dr. King that reminded that I must complete this book.
No American citizen should suffer the mental and physical anguish I experienced from New York State Department of Corrections employees, New York Attorney General’s Office and the American Judiciary System.
November 17, 2006
I am feeling more empowered and stronger. It has taken me 3 days (30 hours) to write about the January 7, 1996 incidents. I am using the five-paged memo titled Lost Or Stolen ID as a guide. I am so thankful that I wrote all of those documents and kept them. God knew that I would need them. I must hold on to the fact that with the vision from God comes the provisions. It is 2:19 am and I am ending my writing for today. I worked 10 hours today on the book. It was a good day.
December 9, 2006
I almost complete the portion of book that deals with the retaliatory action of Berbary ordering Sgt. Fasano and C.O. Frost the Vice President of the local Council 82 union to escort me out of the facility. Writing this book is emotionally and physically painful. I am experiencing pain in my lower back (from my butt all the way down to the middle of my thigh). I am very sad as the memories come rushing through my mind. It is 1:00 a.m. I need a break from this difficult assignment. I will work on completing this portion of the book tomorrow.
February 3, 2007
I have almost completed the chapter of this book titled “My Summary Judgment Motion - Retaliation.” This has been a difficult chapter for me to write. The emotional pain of reliving every aspect of this ordeal is almost unbearable. Vivid memories including the initial discrimination at Albion, the failure to supervisory staff to correct it, the retaliation that I experienced, New York State Division of Human Right’s no probable cause ruling, New York State Attorney General’s filing of perjured declarations/affidavits, and Judge Elfvin failure to appoint counsel to represent me during my lawsuit are crushing my spirit and my resolve to complete this book and to fulfill my divine purpose.
I have gained strength, confirmation, and encouragement from various religious broadcast and sermons. In my determination to fulfill the divine purpose of my life I typed and saved a document titled “Confirmation of Purpose from Religious Broadcast”. At 12:40 a.m. I pulled up the document and read part of sermon from Bishop T. D. Jakes.
Bishop T. D. Jakes on September 20, 2006
“Man has nothing to do with God’s promise. People don’t have to approve it. You must know that God blessed it he that has begun a good work in your life and will fulfill it until the return of Christ.”
Fear the controversy but do it any way. Man has nothing to do with God’s promise. Don’t abort your baby you may have pain, not have friendships. Pain is an indication that birth is getting close.”
I am crying now as I type this. I truly fear what may happen to me after my book is published. I fear for my life but I know that God’s perfect will for my life will be fulfilled.
Bishop Jakes continued, “This is the time that you have to bare down, when opposition is getting strongest, you have to bear down. Great things are often born out of the system.” He cited the example of Mary and the birth of Christ. The system will lock you out don’t wait for the system to make room. God birth a King in a barn. You must trust God promise to you.
“Many people have given up on God’s promise because man has said there is no room for them. The greatness of the concept may not be ideal circumstance but it is still the promise. Redefine willing you have to be willing to be in an uncomfortable situation to get what God has promised you”
After reading Bishop Jake’s sermon I accepted his challenge and his confirmation of God’s promise to me. I will complete this chapter and this book because it is an assignment from God. I love you Lord and I surrender to your perfect will.
CONCLUSION
The horrible experience of my Title VII case still causes me to shed tears. Only God knows how many other whole human beings have suffered, cried, and prayed to be treated according to the rules, according to the law, and according to the United States Constitution.
Thank you Holy Spirit for this revelation and the fact that I feel better now. I feel better because I realize that I suffered and am still suffering so that other people will not have to endure or experience my ordeal of discrimination and retaliation.
Vera Richardson
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